Dating Games, Part 9

Andreas Ortmann
5 min readAug 4, 2023

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“Anye impietie may lawfully be committed in love, which is lawlesse.”

John Lyly, Euphues (1578)

[Some facts below may be fictitious, for the sake of the narrative! ;-)]

Previously, … (and admittedly it’s been quite a while since my last missive in matters love and war), I told you about Northern-Beaches beauties and dingbats with dictaphones and how dating can bring one to parts of Sydney one never saw (Manly! McMahons Point!) or rarely visits (Chatswood! Newtown!). I also mentioned how difficult it can be to cut through the crap and deception, or at least economy with truth writ large, that seem to come with the territory.

A lot has happened since I last updated you. That was partially due to the usual end-of-the-term madness, and partially due to the fact that I write this update from Prague where I am in week 7 of more than three months of European sojourn. (Technically it is called a sabbatical where I am supposed to work hard on research but where I indulge in writing about cafes and coffeehouses in Praha 1 and just shoot the breeze as much as I can. Just kidding. I am working hard but also am catching up with old colleagues, friends, and lovers.)

It just did not seem to make much sense to invest heavily in the dating and mating game in Sydney when soon it would have to be paused.

I did pursue a couple of promising leads, with one of them having become a regular, and enjoyable, date of sorts. And there continues to be an irregular trickle of women contacting me. Alas … we’ll see whether they are still around the joint once I am back to Sydney and Melbourne in late September. (One told me that she is seeing someone and wished me luck but continues to post ever racier pictures of herself (?). She also changed her name from “Judy” to “Eve”. Right. And I am Adam.)

I continue to find the occasional warning in my mailbox by my dating platform of choice:

[platform] Security Alert <mail@security.platform.com>

To: aortmann@yahoo.com

Mon, May 29 at 9:25 PM

Hi Andreas,

Unfortunately, someone who contacted you — “biaoda”, age 68 from World Square — has been removed from Platform on suspicion of acting with fraudulent intent. To stay safe, stop all communication with this person — and remember: never send money or financial information to anyone you meet online.

If you’ve already sent money or banking details, then please contact your bank immediately — or in the case of gift card payments, the company who issued the card. You should also reset any passwords you may have shared.

Why am I receiving this email?

Online dating sites are sometimes targeted by so-called “romance scammers”. These are con artists who adopt fake identities and build up very convincing online relationships with their targets. Then, after some time, they make up a story and ask for money.

We work around the clock to keep scammers away — but unfortunately, anyone who is able to commit identity theft can also falsify a dating profile.

Scammers may try to trick you into not trusting this email. If you have any doubts or questions then please contact our Customer Success Team.

How to identify scammers

If you suspect someone is a scammer, you should immediately cease all contact and report the profile. Some common scammer behaviors include:
• Asking to communicate off [platform] right away (e.g., texting, calling, using another site, etc.)
• Being unable to meet in person — sometimes claiming to be stuck in another country.
• Asking for money or financial information — often pretending this is to pay for travel expenses, medical bills or other emergencies.
• Offering you a job or investment opportunity (e.g. encouraging you to buy cryptocurrency, etc.).


If you believe you have been the victim of an online dating or romance scam, report your experience to your local law enforcement, the FBI and / or the FTC.

So there.

In this case, there were enough smoking guns. “biaoda”, age 68 from World Square, posted a picture of a pretty young thing. 68? Not even year of birth can make sense of that number.

More smoking guns: The voluptuous beauty below (allegedly called Helen) also was too obviously a scammer. You don’t need platform security to tell you.

Here’s another such case:

Oh, “melon”, u pretty thing. You are so going to hell!

Talking about salvation … That allegedly Christian lady (“Michelle”) that “interviewed me” and subsequently got banned from the other platform that I used briefly, made a surprise re-appearance. I had some fun with that one. Proposed we pray together but s/he does not seem to have a sense of humor.

Interestingly, the princess from Brizzy and her son were traveling in Europe but we realized too late that we could have overlapped in Paris and so did not manage to connect. Life is tuff (and then we die). I see another trip to Brizzy in my future though.

And that’s it for Dating Games issue 9; the next iteration most likely to come when I am back in the land of Oz and ready for further explorations.

That’s entertainment!

Consider making your opinion known by applauding, or commenting, or following me here, or on Facebook.

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Andreas Ortmann

EconProf: I post occasionally on whatever tickles my fancy: Science, evidence production, the Econ tribe, Oz politics, etc. Y’all r entitled to my opinions …