Dating Games, Part 5 (Easter edition)

Andreas Ortmann
6 min readApr 8, 2023

What do you get when you fall in love?
You only get lies and pain and sorrow
So for at least until tomorrow
I’ll never fall in love again

Don’t you know that I’ll never fall in love again

(David Hal, Bacharach Burt F, Dionne Warwick)

Previously, … I told you about Northern Beaches beauties and dingbats with dictaphones and how dating can bring one to parts of Sydney one never saw (Manly!) or rarely visits (Chatswood!). I also mentioned how difficult it can be to cut through the crap & deception, or at least economy with truth writ large, that seem to come with the territory. Plus, I mentioned that the asynchronous nature of the dating game invites all kinds of potentially conflicting expectations, … and interpretations …

And I told you about my excursion to Brizzy, in search of the one. Got along with her, and her son, quite well, we even talked about coordinating our European travel plans later this summer. Alas, the princess is not exactly … communicative. Or maybe she is just really busy, chauffeuring her son to chess, debate, and fencing competitions, helping him on his homework, and all the while running her business. Hmmmh. Haven’t yet given up hope …

I also told you that I was headed towards a teaching tunnel which is why this Dating Games epi has taken longer …

[Some facts below may be fictitious, for the sake of the narrative! ;-)]

As you might recall, I wondered about that mysterious woman in Mascot who expressed interest weeks after I expressed mine and even asked for my number but had yet to call. (She still hasn’t even tho she has visited my profile a couple of times.)

In fact, there are several such cases. Like the lovely lady originally from Persia. Or … or … or … It is puzzling. I guess everyone is shopping around … (Stop the press: Good Friday was a very good friday indeed … .)

You Do Something To Me — YouTube

Meanwhile, I did catch up with the woman I met a couple of times in Chatswood (and that invited me past my bed-time to join her, and her gang of Chinese women, in Leichhardt after they watched EEAAO); this time we met for dinner and a movie (Living, how appropriate a movie was that!). She sent me a sweet message after she arrived back home. This (Easter) weekend we have another movie outing planned. Going to see EO.

I also met over dinner, IRL, finally the Facey friend who had previously attested me a puerile blog and had thanked me …

… for confirming my suspicion that men who frequent dating sites are likely to be socially incompetent IRL.

Turns out we had a nice long dinner, with plenty of vino, and she seems to have revised her opinion.

Nice to be your friend IRL, Andreas. (Name)

Meanwhile a prospect in Canberry asked me the eternal question:

She: What kind of woman do you like?

Me: Good morning, (Name). Not an easy question to answer. Age and ethnicity do not matter much to me. I don’t like jaded women and can’t stand ungratefulness. And I don’t have time for fussing and fighting and temper tantrums. Life’s too short. Obviously it is important that you feel comfortable with each other and that you can communicate well.

P.S. Ob blond, ob schwarz, ob braun // Ich liebe alle Frauen

Another prospect wrote (a week out from Easter break):

She: Thanks for reaching out, Andreas, but I am all scheduled up until the end of the Easter break. Wishing you a happy holidays ;-)

Me: Thanks for writing; let me know when you can schedule me in ;-) Happy Easter!

And this also happened:

She: Hi thanks for making contact. You are gorgeous. Would have gladly met you but l am seeing someone. Best wishes

Me: Very sweet of you to say that. I might list you as reference! ;-) Best wishes 2 u 2!

She: Happy to be your referee. I am in fact at the tail end of a short relationship. Ultimately we are not that compatible.

She (a couple of days later) What are you looking for here? How long have you been single?

Me: ;-) Good morning, (Name). Now there’s an interesting turn of events! Sorry to hear about that short relationship seemingly not working out. Relationships are hard.

I ended a seven-year-plus relationship about 6–7 months ago. We had five good years and two-plus not so good ones.

I am looking for interesting women to hang out with and shoot the breeze. If it leads to more, so much the better. Also, in vino veritas. You?

And so another dinner was scheduled … .

(Confidential to M: Those Samsung Notes files come in handy. Thanks for asking! ;-))

I now get a steady stream of invitations to dating sites, like this one. The site pretends to rank dating platforms like booking.com ranks its accommodation options. Problem is, it is not clear how the ranking is computed and from the small sample on which I draw, it is pretty unreliable. The one that works for me reasonably well is not even listed, and the one that I decided to discontinue within weeks of signing up for it is ranked in the top. No way.

My platform of choice sent me this yesterday:

Platform Security Alert <mail@security.platform.com>

To:aortmann@yahoo.com

Sat, Apr 8 at 12:50 AM

[platform logo]

Hi Andreas,

Unfortunately, someone who contacted you — “k”, age 59 from Brighton — has been removed from Platform on suspicion of acting with fraudulent intent. To stay safe, stop all communication with this person — and remember: never send money or financial information to anyone you meet online.

If you’ve already sent money or banking details, then please contact your bank immediately — or in the case of gift card payments, the company who issued the card. You should also reset any passwords you may have shared.

Why am I receiving this email?

Online dating sites are sometimes targeted by so-called “romance scammers”. These are con artists who adopt fake identities and build up very convincing online relationships with their targets. Then, after some time, they make up a story and ask for money.

We work around the clock to keep scammers away — but unfortunately, anyone who is able to commit identity theft can also falsify a dating profile.

Scammers may try to trick you into not trusting this email. If you have any doubts or questions then please contact our Customer Success Team.

How to identify scammers

If you suspect someone is a scammer, you should immediately cease all contact and report the profile. Some common scammer behaviors include:
• Asking to communicate off Platform right away (e.g., texting, calling, using another site, etc.)
• Being unable to meet in person — sometimes claiming to be stuck in another country.
• Asking for money or financial information — often pretending this is to pay for travel expenses, medical bills or other emergencies.
• Offering you a job or investment opportunity (e.g. encouraging you to buy cryptocurrency, etc.).

If you believe you have been the victim of an online dating or romance scam, report your experience to your local law enforcement, the FBI and / or the FTC.

Find out more

For more information about staying safe online, please visit [platform]. If you have any questions, don’t hesitate to get in touch at [platform].

Your Platform Team

Did I mention that it’s a funny game, that dating game? A game of economy with truth writ large …

And that’s it for this Easter edition; at least until tomorrow I’ll never fall in love again but then …

Paul Weller — My Ever Changing Moods (Visualiser) — YouTube

Still deep in the teaching tunnel, so no idea when the next edition will appear but appear it will. Promise, Uli!

Consider making your opinion known by applauding, or commenting, or following me here, or on Facebook.

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Andreas Ortmann

EconProf: I post occasionally on whatever tickles my fancy: Science, evidence production, the Econ tribe, Oz politics, etc. Y’all r entitled to my opinions …